Friday, August 22, 2014

Letters From Israel

BACK  TO  THE  FUTURE  by  Even-More-Confused-than-Usual Moshe

Oh, Joy!!! No sooner had I completed my unseemly whining over the apparent success of the cease-fire, when our Piece Loving neighbors – renowned for their decency and kindness – took mercy on me and resumed the shelling.
Three missiles fired at Beersheba early in the afternoon marked renewal of the festivities. 
It was shortly after 9. We were watching a special, Who Can Be More Irritating: Judge Judy or Dr. Phil ?  The special was hosted by Ellen Degenerate. Rachel said she heard explosions. I apologized, saying I had been eating potato chips. No, said Rachel, these are non-odiferous explosions. Within seconds the siren sounded signaling the return of comforting normalcy. Sirens/explosions non-stop thru now, 1:15am. Rachel has collapsed from exhaustion, and even the constant thudding rattling the house cannot rouse her.

One scene in the film THE HEART OF DARKNESS opens on a battlefield with an officer saying "I love the smell of napalm in the morning". It was pretty close to that here this morning, with a thick haze covering everything and the smell of gunpowder very strong. We are supposed to get visitors later in the day, but they may not come because of the situation. If they do come, I'll try and get Rachel to return with them toJerusalem for several days. She really needs to get out of here for a while.  

These are truly special people, genuinely gutsy, who spent the last weeks in our home in Gush Katif. A rabbi and his wife have been our spiritual guides for years, and trusted friends. They have three sons in the army. A Dutch Christian couple… I can only describe them as soulmates. They have an exceptional son in the IDF.
They called to say they were bringing food with them, and indeed they brought enough for a platoon for a week. But Rachel lives on the 'what if?' principle and ordered me to Ashkelon to buy food, just in case…
I was in a pharmacy in a mall when the sirens sounded. To my amazement/amusement, except for eyes rolling and a few groans nobody headed for the shelter in the back of the pharmacy. When I tried to exit with my purchase I found the front door locked. The girl who unlocked the door explained that in the past when the staff and customers ran to the shelter, people would enter the store and steal whatever they could.
If it was strange inside the pharmacy, outside was surreal. More sirens, sounds of explosions, and people walking around as if nothing was happening. Even young mothers and fathers pushing carriages and strollers, smiling and seemingly unconcerned. Here and there someone stood silent, generally an older person, nervously scanning the skies.

The guests arrived, sirens sounded at fifteen minute intervals, everyone had a splendid time. And Rachel agreed, with little argument, to return with them to Jerusalem and stay through the weekend.
So here I am, awash in sirens and explosions and music and cigars and food. Heaven.
May G-d protect all who believe in Him, even idiots like me.
Shabbat Shalom.

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